What Friends Are For
by ryanro
Summary: Kizami gets into trouble and has to spend the night at Kurosaki's, leading into some interesting conversation. (kizami/kurosaki, fluff now, maybe smut later? who knows)
1. Sleepover

(author's note: ive never written a story in my life literally. Im more the drawing type. So if this sucks im sorry I really have no other excuses)

"Fuck this!"

Kizami screamed as he slammed his front door, rubbing his temple and groaning. He's had it with this fucking family. All of them, worthless. If only he were of age, he wouldn't be subjected to living in this household. Letting out a sigh, he turns and examines his reflection in the window.

He grimaces, lifting a hand to push his long bangs back and examine his eye. He flinched a bit; it stung to the touch. The red around it on his skin's surface was clearly visible, and a bruise had already begun to form. "Great…" he sighs, stepping off his front porch and looking into the sky. Of course it would be raining tonight, of all nights. Of course it would.

Not much he can do about it now, though. All he has are the clothes on his back, and he certainly can't go back inside to grab anything after that whole scene. Things will probably cool off by morning, as they always do, but for now he just needs a place to stay. Stepping down the front porch and into the rain, the tall boy shoves his hands clumsily into his pockets and slouches over. He starts walking through the rain, on his way to the only place he knows he can stay.

Kurosaki laid on his bed, totally immersed in his PSP. He had just bought a new portable dating sim game, but just as it was getting to the good part he hears a gentle knock at the front door. "Tch.." Kurosaki sucks his teeth, setting his PSP down on the table in sleep mode and quickly making his way downstairs. He glances through the small peep window in the door and sighs. He'd know that silhouette anywhere. He quietly pulls the door open.

"Kizami?"

"Kurosaki…sorry to intrude."

Kurosaki blinks, and turns to look at the clock hanging by the door. "It's so late…what happened, Kizami? You lock yourself out aga-" he cuts himself short, getting a better look at Kizami's face. Even with Kizami's slumped posture, he can look up and clearly see the shiner darkening around his eye. Kurosaki gives off a worried sigh, to which Kizami responds by slouching further, almost apologetically.

But of course Kurosaki doesn't ask any questions. He's known Kizami so long. He knows what his life is like at home. He wishes there was something he could do, but, he knows deep down that Kizami isn't totally free of blame. Still, Kurosaki feels that maybe it just isn't his place to interfere with family affairs. They quietly make their way back upstairs, to Kurosaki's room, careful to not wake the rest of the Kurosaki household.

"Here, put these on." Kurosaki says as he tosses Kizami a towel and some dry clothes: a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt.

"Ah, thanks.." Kizami says, proceeding to pull his damp shirt up and over his head.

"W-w-whoa!" Kurosaki stammers, quickly facing the opposite direction. "Uh, y-you go ahead and get changed, I'll go get some snacks!" and before Kizami can even react, Kurosaki is out the door, and the light _'tmp-tmp-tmp' _of his footsteps down the stairs echoes back.

Kizami smirked. Heh, he didn't expect Kurosaki to be such a prude. He must get changed in front of other guys all the time; having been into sports his whole life. Maybe it was different because the two of them were so close? Kizami just shrugged it off as his finished getting changed, folding his wet clothes neatly and stacking them atop the folded towel.

He looked around Kurosaki's room. Kizami had been here plenty of times before, and aside from a few minor aesthetic changes, it was still basically the same. There was a bed, a small table in the center, a closet, a television with a game console…nothing you wouldn't find in the room of an average teenage boy. Kurosaki kept his room…relatively neat; neater than one would assume someone like him keeps house, anyway. Kizami scuffs a few stray articles of clothing on the floor with his foot, pushing them to the side, clearing space where he intended to sleep.

He sneered and glanced at the bed, reminiscing on a time where he discovered Kurosaki's…personal magazines, so to speak, under the mattress. Average teenage boy indeed.

The tall boy kneeled down at the table, sitting up straight and proper as he usually does, in the place he usually does. Shortly after, Kurosaki returns, carrying armfuls of various snack foods and drinks. "And I'm back!" he exclaims, haphazardly dropping the snacks on to the table, and plopping himself on the floor beside his best friend, with significantly less perfect posture, to say the least.

"Thank you for letting me stay." Kizami said as he reached for a can of tea Kurosaki brought with him. "I'm sorry I didn't call ahead…I left my phone behind at the house. I'm surprised you were still awake."

Kurosaki pulled open a bag of chips, tearing the bag all the way so that he could share with his friend. "Yeah, I'm strangely not very sleepy tonight. I think it has something to do with this game I just got." Kurosaki says as he picks up his PSP, taking it off of sleep mode and waving it around in the air. "It's the latest portable dating sim on the market! X-rated." He snickers.

"Mm.." Kizami hums, feigning interest. Kurosaki's games never particularly interested him.

Kurosaki grumbled at Kizami's obvious apathy. Even when they were kids, he wouldn't play games. Fixing his eyes on his PSP, Kurosaki mindlessly flips through the options for a bit as Kizami opens his drink. Then, Kurosaki starts thinking.

"…Hey Kizami, what's your type?"

"My…'type'?"

"Yeah! You know! Your type! It's the kind of person you're typically attracted to! Everyone has a type!"

"Er, I don't think-"

"C'mon!" Kurosaki exclaims, practically shoving the PSP into Kizami's hands, "Just take a look! There're all kinds of girls in here!"

Kizami groans, but takes the console anyway. His expression remains still as he flips through the various profiles of scantily-clad anime girls. To be honest, he probably paid more attention to the verbal descriptions. Even then, nothing particularly stood out to him.

"Well?" Kurosaki questioned impatiently.

"I don't really like any of these."

"Booooring!" Kurosaki let out a hard sigh as he leans back, supporting his weight on his arms. "Come on, Kizami, you can't be completely hollow! Don't you have a crush on anyone?"

Kizami sets the PSP back on the table. "How did you buy this game, anyway? You're underage," he enquires, swiftly shifting the topic of conversation.

Kurosaki smirks and rubs his chin. "I dunno. Maybe I'm just so mature and ruggedly handsome that the teller didn't feel the need to check my ID."

This elicits a chuckle from Kizami. Kurosaki laughed in return, rubbing the back of his head. "Heheheh, hey shut up!" he jests. It wasn't often that Kizami genuinely laughed, so to Kurosaki it felt like a huge accomplishment to be the one to get him to laugh, even if it is at his own expense.

"So, Kurosaki, what's your 'type' then?"

"Eh, my type?" he crosses his arms and scrunches his nose, really giving the question serious thought. "Hrrmm..hard to say..I have a lot of favorites.." Kurosaki shrugs. "I dunno, I like them all!"

"I see." Kizami replies disdainfully, popping a potato chip in his mouth. Typical Kurosaki, not knowing what he wants.

"Sheesh, what's with that attitude? You might not have a type, but that doesn't mean you don't attract, my dearest Ki-za-mi~" he nudges the taller boys shoulder and grins. "In fact, just the other day Kirisaki was asking about you, I think you might have an admirer!"

It wasn't any secret that Kizami was popular among the girls at Byakudan High. He was tall, handsome, and carried that quiet and mysterious demeanor. Even some of the guys, such as Shimada, were envious of him. Kurosaki was unsure if Kizami was honestly oblivious to the obvious advances the girls put on him, or if he just simply wasn't interested. To be honest, he'll probably never know for sure. Kizami is very cryptic about that sort of thing.

"Is that so?" Kizami replies, taking another sip of his drink. He smiles and looks down at the can, idly playing with the tab. "But, I don't see her in that way."

Kurosaki sighs, waving his hand in front of his face. "Yeah, yeah. I figured as much." He leans back and looks up at the ceiling. "I just figured you would tell me these things- as your best friend, I mean."

Kizami doesn't reply.

The two spend some more time eating and talking. Or rather, Kurosaki goes on about all kinds of things and Kizami listens, every now and then giving his input. Despite their conflicting personalities, he really does enjoy Kurosaki's company. He assumes Kurosaki feels the same. That would be the only logical answer, right? Why maintain a friendship with someone for so long if you didn't like them? Kizami catches himself thinking about these things sometimes. Heh, how dumb.

Eventually they decide to call it a night, and Kurosaki proclaims it's time for bed.

"It's a good thing we don't have school tomorrow, Kizami. You can wear my loungewear, but I doubt you'd fit into my uniforms!"

"Ah, yeah…" Kizami replies, gesturing to the space he cleared on the floor. "I'll just sleep here."

"What?!" Kurosaki gawks, tapping the floor with his heel. "Kizami, these floors are hardwood, and I don't have an extra futon. My bed is big enough for two; that's how we always had sleepovers as kids!"

Kizami blinks. "I just…thought-"

"Nope!" Kurosaki interrupts, climbing into bed and settling into the side against the wall. "It's okay, I know you don't snore Kizami!"

Kizami sighs, but doesn't argue. He stands up and turns off the ceiling light, before climbing into the bed beside Kurosaki and lying down. He flinches a little, as the side of his face against the pillow was still pretty tender. "Nn.." Eventually he gets used to it, and closes his eyes. For a few moments, Kizami just lays there. To be honest, he wasn't tired enough to fall asleep instantly, but he didn't want to disturb his friend. So he just lays there with his eyes closed, absorbing the dead silence of the room, and the sound of the rain outside.

"..Hey…Kizami?"

"Mm?" Kizami opens his eyes to discover Kurosaki staring at him intently. "..Kurosaki?"

Kurosaki smiles. "You never did answer my question."

"Ah..your question?"

"Yeah. Do you have a crush on anyone?"

Kizami choked as he felt a warm sensation fill his cheeks. He supposes there's really no point in being secretive with Kurosaki. When he said that thing about best friends talking about this kind of thing, it hit pretty hard. Kurosaki confides everything in him; Kurosaki trusts him, so why can't he show him the same trust? In his whole life, no one has been more loyal to Kizami than Kurosaki – not even his own family. If there was anyone to expose his vulnerability to, it would be Kurosaki.

He only worries how Kurosaki might react.

"…Yes."

"Ehh?!" Kurosaki propped himself up quickly. "For real, Kizami?!"

"Is that so hard to believe?"

"Huh? No, no! It's just- I mean- You've never said anything, or even given off any signs!" Kurosaki lies back down, but inches closer to his friend. "So, what's she like?"

Here goes.

"…H-he…"

"Oh…"

Kurosaki fell silent. He never did inquire if Kizami preferred the opposite or same sex; or if he even had a preference at all. It isn't really any of his business anyway. Of course it didn't matter to him. He was still Kizami. Still, it was wrong of him to assume Kizami was attracted to girls by default. Man, he must look so ridiculous!

All of that aside, this was still an extremely personal thing for Kizami to share- and he chose to confide in him. Him, Kurosaki Kensuke! For the longest time, Kurosaki thought Kizami treated him with the same indifference as he treats everyone else. But with this revelation, maybe it's Kizami's way of reaffirming their friendship. Maybe Kizami thought of Kurosaki as his best friend after all. That thought alone was enough to make Kurosaki grin from ear to ear.

All these thoughts occurred to Kurosaki in a split second, but to Kizami, the silence seemed to stretch on forever, making him fidget a bit.

"Okay!" Kurosaki piped up, still smiling. "What's he like, then?"

Kizami's eyes widened, and he offered no response other than a few incoherent stammers. His cheeks flushed even fuller now, and his blush would be fully visible if it weren't dark as it was. He was honestly not expecting Kurosaki to react this way. Deep down he knew Kurosaki would never hate him for something like this, but, he wasn't even phased! There we absolutely no questions asked, he immediately accepted it, and eagerly badgered Kizami for information, just as he had been doing before.

No one…no one else would have reacted the same way. He was sure of it. Kurosaki…he's so naive! He's so stupid!

He's…probably the best friend Kizami could ever ask for.

"Hmm? Come again?" Kurosaki persisted, snapping Kizami from his train of thought.

"Ah, um," he finally managed to cough up some words. "He is…kind, and funny, er, a little scatterbrained…I suppose…erm..." Kizami struggled to gather his thoughts. This was something completely foreign to him.

He didn't want to reveal too much, either. One confession was enough for tonight.

Growing increasingly stressed and uncomfortable, Kizami fidgeted more, shifting his vision at anything but his friend's face. The heat in his face gradually spreads, until even his ears were tinted red. The only thing that brought him out of his bubble of worry and back into reality was a loud laugh from Kurosaki, which startled him so much that he jumped a bit.

"Ahaha! That's great, man! I'm so glad!" Kurosaki chuckled, giving Kizami a friendly pat on the shoulder. "Don't stress so much, everything will go just fine."

Kurosaki smiled at him. His smile was enough to put Kizami at ease again, and he couldn't help but return the gesture.

"Thank you, Kurosaki. I mean…for everything."

"Heh, no problem, buddy! I do it out of love, you know?"

Kizami nodded his head. Kurosaki proceeds to let out a big yawn and stretches, slumping down into the bed and closing his eyes. Kizami lies awake, watching his friend curiously. Eventually, Kurosaki's breaking slows and falls into a rhythm, indicating that he is fast asleep. Kizami hums softly, his eyes falling half lidded as he looks over his friend, that warm feeling tingling in his cheeks once more.

"I love you, too."


	2. Sleepover (bonus)

**(bonus continuation of chapter 1)**

Kurosaki was fast asleep, and to be honest he was in the middle of a pretty good dream. Of course, he isn't consciously aware that he's dreaming. To him, there's nothing abnormal about being surrounded by beautiful girls. But his dream fantasy is quickly cut short, and Kurosaki feels a heavy pressure on his chest. Finding difficulty in breathing, he snaps back to consciousness with a gasp, and frantically looks around the room. He didn't see anything with his eyes still adjusting to the darkness, but the tightening around his chest was still there. He moves to sit up, but he can't.

Kurosaki peers down to his side, to the source of his constraint. Squinting a little, he's able to make out the figure of his best friend. There lay Kizami, who had his strong arms wrapped around Kurosaki's small frame so tight, he was cutting off the smaller boy's air supply. Kizami was awake, clearly conscious of his actions, however he had his head buried into Kurosaki's side and couldn't see that Kurosaki was awake.

"K-kizami..can't.." Kurosaki rasps out, to which Kizami loosens his grip considerably, but doesn't unhand his friend.

"Ah..sorry, Kurosaki.." Kizami mumbles, being further muffled with his face pressed to Kurosaki's chest.

Kurosaki was perplexed. This was very strange of Kizami…he's never been the particularly affectionate type, and didn't really hug anybody (if that could even be called a hug), so something was up. Kurosaki leaned in closer, his vision now clear as can be, and takes a closer look at his friend. Kizami was visibly shaking. Any noise that he was possibly making was drowned out by the sound of the rain outside.

"H-hey..Kizami..you okay?" he said, reaching down to put a reassuring hand on his friend's shoulder. Kurosaki's touch quelled Kizami's shaking considerably and he finally pulled away from Kurosaki's side, still not letting him go, but pulling his face away and giving Kurosaki a silent nod, refusing to look up at him.

Kurosaki just sat there, observing Kizami silently. That nod was the only response Kizami gave, and Kizami's eyes remained affixed to Kurosaki's side, where his face was smothered before. This was so weird! Kizami wasn't even behaving like himself; something was obviously wrong. But with his friend refusing to speak, Kurosaki wasn't getting any answers. Finally, a noise broke the silence and dragged Kurosaki from his state of confusion: a crack of thunder far off in the distance. Looks like the storm hadn't let up since the two friends went to sleep. When the thunder shook, Kurosaki felt Kizami flinch, and grip his shirt a little more tightly for a brief second. Kurosaki blinked and shifted his gaze back to his friend. No way…

"Kizami…"

Kizami glanced up at his friend.

"Are you...are you afraid of storms?.."

"Of course not! Idiot!" Kizami barked, a slight faltering in his voice, "Why would I be afraid of something stupid like that?!"

Almost instantly, as soon as Kizami finished scolding Kurosaki, the room fills with a flash of light, and thunder booms so loud it's almost as if the storm were right outside their window. The loud rumble sends a jolt up Kizami's spine, causing his to snap back to clinging to his companion, just as tightly as before. Kurosaki choked, coughing a little to relieve some of the pressure Kizami was putting on his ribcage. He looked down. Kizami has his face buried in Kurosaki's shirt once more, and all Kurosaki could see was his mop of black hair. Kizami was trembling more noticeably now, almost quaking, with fear. Kurosaki could actually feel Kizami's vibrations against his own body.

So, he was afraid after all.

It makes sense, though. When they were kids and Kizami slept over, if a storm started, Kizami was nowhere to be found- no matter how hard Kurosaki looked. He must have been hiding. It's not uncommon for children to be afraid of thunderstorms, but for that fear to have followed him to adulthood, Kizami must not have had anyone to help him cope with it.

Kurosaki smiled, chuckling a little under his breath. Seeing Kizami like this...it wasn't particularly funny, but it was just sort of…endearing, in a way. He did feel kind of bad for him, though. Poor guy. Sighing a little, Kurosaki reaches over, running a hand through Kizami's thick hair.

"There there, Kizami…" Kurosaki hums, stroking his friend's hair for a bit, before drifting lower, rubbing his back. He wasn't even sure if this kind of contact would help Kizami calm down, but it always worked for Kurosaki when he was a kid, and it calmed him down just a minute ago.

Sure enough, Kizami's quivering stops, and his breathing slows. His constricting arms around Kurosaki loosen, and his eyelids grow heavy. He just sort of lays there, his arms loosely cradling Kurosaki's smaller frame as the world around them grows dark and silent. The unexplainable fear that plagued Kizami's heart was gone, with a strange warmth replacing it. Kizami was calm, he was content, he was safe. He lets his eyelids fall, and the last thing he sees before drifting off to sleep is Kurosaki's smiling face, looking down at Kizami with tender, caring eyes.

"Mm.."


	3. confessions

**(author's note: the reason my fic updates take so long is because im really bad at writing I apologize, I hope this doesn't suck too much)**

* * *

"Hmm…"

Kurosaki sat in his classroom as the teacher drones on. He stares down at his bare notebook pages. Normally he at least writes something down, but not today. Today he had something else on his mind. After that impromptu sleepover with Kizami the other night, Kurosaki had gained some pretty juicy knowledge. Kurosaki now knew that his best friend, who up until now he thought was completely stoic, actually had feelings for someone. Real feelings. Real _romantic_ feelings. It was quite a breakthrough. Kurosaki was dying to know more, but…he knew pushing Kizami for information that night probably wouldn't be a good idea. Maybe pushing at all would be rude. Kizami confided in him, after all.

"Of course, that doesn't mean I can't speculate," Kurosaki thought as he glances around the classroom. The only thing Kizami revealed about his crush was that they were male. "That narrows down my search by roughly half…" Kurosaki ponders, scribbling down a rough map of the classroom seating chart in his notebook. He sat in the back, so he had an optimal view of his entire class. With a square representing each desk, he puts an X through each square that represents one of his female classmates.

"Right…about half…"

Kurosaki marks Kizami's desk with a star, before sitting up and looking at his friend. Kizami was listening diligently and taking notes accordingly. Despite being naturally intelligent, Kizami sure did take his schoolwork seriously. Kurosaki chuckles as he looks back down at his notebook, down at the chart he was making rather than taking notes himself. There's no way he would be able to focus anyway, not until he figures this out.

"Let's see…" Kurosaki mutters, pressing his pencil cap to his lip. "Excluding myself," he thought, as he crosses out his own desk. "Kizami only really speaks to four of the boys in class," he finishes, circling the respective boys' desks accordingly. Kurosaki sits up and crosses his arms, surveying his classroom once more, and takes a moment to examine each potential suspect.

"Katayama or Ohkawa are out." He says, crossing out the respective squares. "If the amount of games I play bothers Kizami, there's no way he could tolerate either of those two." He drifts his gaze to Fukuroi, who was even more feverishly taking notes.

"Fukuroi…it's possible, but I don't think Kizami really cares for him beyond the standard formalities of acquaintanceship." Another X.

"That just leaves…Shimada…" Kurosaki trails off, looking over at Shimada- or rather, the desk Shimada _would_ be sitting in if he weren't skipping class. Kurosaki rolls his eyes. Kizami can't stand Shimada, and Shimada has that whole one-sided rivalry thing going on with Kizami. There was absolutely no way.

"Maybe…it's like an anime…" Kurosaki wonders. "Maybe Kizami's contempt..actually disguises his deep-rooted feelings of love. So…that would make Kizami…tsundere?"

Kurosaki snorts at that very thought. He crosses out Shimada's desk as he struggles to stifle his laughter. Kizami turns to look at him, cocking an eyebrow.

* * *

The school bell rings, signifying lunch time. Kizami stands, taking his lunch out of his bag and walking to the back to sit with Kurosaki, as usual. Kurosaki is face down in his notebook, obviously disgruntled.

"Did you not understand the lecture?" Kizami asks, pulling up a chair to the side of Kurosaki's desk and taking a seat.

"I wasn't even paying attention." Kurosaki says, lifting his head from his desk and looking at his friend.

"…What?" Kizami asks, breaking the uncomfortable silence of his friend's gaze.

There's another pause, before Kurosaki faceplants back into his desk.

"Kizami…please…tell me who you like!" he shoots up and stares at his friend, wide-eyed, "I swear I won't tell! You can beat me up if I do, but it's driving me crazy!" he grabs his notebook, holding it in front of Kizami's face. "I spent the whole morning trying to crack the case myself, but I have no good leads. It's killing me, Kizami! My grades will suffer a lot at this rate! I mean….more than they do normally!" he sobs, slamming the notebook down on the table.

Kizami just blinks at him. "You're still thinking about that? Huh..I assumed you would have forgotten."

"Of course I haven't forgotten, idiot! This is probably the biggest thing you've ever told me."

"And it's really bothering you that much?"

"Yes! I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't invade your privacy, Kizami…I guess I'm just a little over-excited…"

Kizami looks at Kurosaki a bit longer, before letting out a sigh and sliding his notebook over, turning to a clean page. "I'll write down their surname for you." He says, taking out a pen and scribbling something down, before handing the notebook back to Kurosaki, who snatches it back eagerly. Taking one look at the notebook, he discovers that Kizami scribbled a bunch of lines, almost as if he left out most of the pen strokes of the name he wrote.

"Kizami…this doesn't say anything..." Kurosaki inquires, peering up from the notebook.

"We're going to your house after school so you can copy my notes, right? I'll fill in what's missing for you then, provided you actually pay attention in the rest of your classes, and take some notes." The taller boy looks down at Kurosaki sternly, tapping the notebook with his pen.

"Tch." That bastard Kizami. He really knows how to pull the right strings. "Fine…"

"Good." Kizami nods.

Kurosaki just pouts, and starts to eat his lunch.

* * *

The train ride home was probably the longest and most uncomfortable of Kurosaki's life. Kizami was never one for small talk. Kurosaki glanced up at Kizami every now and then, but the tall boy's gaze never left the window, even when Kurosaki found himself spacing out and staring, Jeez…

After what seemed like an eternity the two made it to the Kurosaki household. As usual, the house was empty. Kurosaki's parents both worked late, so he let himself and his friend in with his key. He starts walking toward the kitchen to get some snacks, but stops himself when he only hears one set of footsteps. Turning around, he sees Kizami standing at attention by the door with his outdoor shoes still on, waiting for proper permissions to come in. Kizami has always been exceptionally polite, despite having been here countless times.

"Heh, you can just go up to my room, Kizami. I'm just gonna go get some drinks."

"Mm. Thank you." Kizami slips of his shoes and puts on some house slippers, dutifully heading upstairs to Kurosaki's room. Kurosaki just chuckles and heads into the kitchen.

* * *

It seems like they've been at this for hours. Studying is so boring, why do they have to do so much of it?! Kurosaki groans and runs his thumb down his glass, rubbing off some of the condensation off his drink.

"Problem, Kurosaki?"

"Uuugh, just…how long have we been at this?! Is it almost time for a break?"

Kizami arches an eyebrow and looks at the clock. "It hasn't even been an hour. Er-" Kizami grunts as Kurosaki reaches over and slams his notebook shut.

"I'm so burnt out, Kizami! I took so many notes in class, I don't need to do all this work at home! Didn't you promise me something, anyway?" he smirks, pulling out his own notebook and turning to today's lecture notes. "See? Check 'em out! I even focused really hard to make my penmanship look nice!" Kurosaki boasts, holding the notebook open in front of Kizami's face.

"I see." Kizami observes. "These do look nice."

"Hell yeah they do! I worked hard! Are you gonna hold up your end of the bargain, Kizami?" Kurosaki turns to the page Kizami scribbled on and holds it out to him.

The looks Kizami gave Kurosaki was something strange. Something…different. It wasn't a sad look, but it wasn't a happy look either. It definitely wasn't his usual glare of derision. Kurosaki couldn't quite pin it down with one word, but somehow Kizami looked up at him with…less confidence than ever, and it made his heart sink. He started to slouch forward, tripping over his words.

"Er…I mean, y-you don't…have to tell me, if you don't want to, Kizami. I mean, uhm, I don't want to make you uncomfortable, or anything…"

"No, I'm a man of my word, Kurosaki." Kizami says, taking the notebook back and scribbling down on that page, filling in the missing pen strokes. He closes the notebook, sets it down on the table, and reopens his notebook, continuing to study like nothing happened.

Kurosaki silently picked up the notebook, being careful not to look too eager, even though he was. He flips open to that familiar page, and his eyes run over the Japanese characters, written in what seemed like a nervous hand. He reads the aloud.

"Kuro…sa..ki..?"

Kurosaki cocked his head to the side and squinted, holding the notebook out farther as if that would change what he saw. Kizami sat still. His pen was in hand, but he wasn't writing, eyes fixed on his notebook. The uncomfortable silence lingered for a few moments before Kurosaki piped up again.

"Kizami…this is my name."

"It is."

"Wh..are you trying to be funny?!"

"No…"

"Then..what.." Kurosaki cleared his throat, which had suddenly gone dry. "I-I mean…when you said you liked guys, I didn't think-"

"I don't like _men_!" Kizami barks, slamming his pen on the table and turning to look at Kurosaki, who is actually a bit startled.

"What?! But, you told me-"

"I don't like _women_ either…" Kizami says, calming his tone down. "I like…Kurosaki. _Only_ Kurosaki…"

"Kizami…" he was doing that look again. That look that made Kurosaki's heart ache. Kurosaki sighs and leans forward with his elbows on the table. "How long have you felt this way?"

"I don't know when I recognized these feelings as…romantic. I didn't say anything, because I know you're not attracted to other males. It seemed pointless."

"Er, well, I mean," Kurosaki laughs nervously, his face flushing a little. He can't believe what he's about to say. "I don't know! I mean, I've never really…thought about it. I mean, I've never been with a guy, but I've never been with a girl either! I've seen girls that I think are cute but, er, I dunno! Eheheh!" Kurosaki trails off laughing quietly. He looks over at his friend, and his heart throbs again at the slight pout Kizami was fronting, still facing away from him. Kurosaki bites his lip. "I-I think…I think you're…pretty cute right now, Kizami…" Kurosaki mumbles, his face growing redder. "I've always admired you, but, right now…you're really, really cute. I've even caught myself staring at you sometimes. A-and when you have that look in your eyes, when you look at me a certain way…I-I can't really explain but, my heart starts racing, and my stomach feels empty. M-maybe…I'm just like you. Maybe I don't like guys, maybe I…only like Kizami…"

At some point during his speech, Kizami looked back up at Kurosaki. When they finally made eye contact again, Kizami's gaze actually made his heart jump. Kizami's eyes were wide; wider than normal, anyway, and he had a slight tint of red in his cheeks. Kurosaki couldn't help but smile.

Kizami turns his body to face his friend, breaking his perfect posture to scoot closer. If it were anyone else, Kurosaki would back up, but he sits up straight as Kizami moves closer, until they are only inches apart. Being closed-in by Kizami's taller and broad frame made Kurosaki's heart pound. Kizami leans down, his face close enough to where he can feel the heat of Kurosaki's blush, which intensifies greatly.

"Can I…kiss you, Kurosaki?.."

"…Yeah…"

Kizami cups the smaller boy's cheek in his hand, gently tilting his head up to make his lips meet with his own. Kizami's lips were soft, and he was surprisingly tender, almost as if he were too nervous to delve deeper into the kiss. Kurosaki was nervous too, though. The kiss didn't last long, maybe a couple seconds, but it was nice. Kurosaki felt far more relaxed as Kizami pulled away, and they both opened their eyes again. Kizami smiled as he caressed Kurosaki's cheek with his thumb, and Kurosaki smiled back, chuckling nervously. Kizami pulled his hand away and drifted down, until he found Kurosaki's hand. He smiles somberly as he runs his fingers over the contours of Kurosaki's knuckles.

"I really like you, Kurosaki." Kizami says, glancing up at Kurosaki.

Kurosaki flushes a little brighter, and laces his fingers through Kizami's.

"I really like you, too."


	4. sleeping in

**(this is told from Kurosaki's point of view, just because I wanted to try a first-person story)**

* * *

Kizami has been sleeping over a lot more recently. I didn't really mind. I knew he liked it much better than his own home, and my parents love Kizami, they didn't mind either. I have to admit, I liked having him around so much, especially when I wake up. The only thing that was a little awkward was having to wear my pajama pants to sleep. It's a little awkward to sleep in just boxers with someone else in the bed.

But it shouldn't be awkward; Kizami and I were a couple now, right? Right? I mean, that would be the logical conclusion. We told each other how we felt, and we…kissed. But for some reason it didn't feel any different, things are the same between us as always. Is this what it feels like to be in a relationship with someone? Or are we still just friends despite what happened? I should just ask Kizami directly…ah, but I don't want to make things weird between us…I'm really enjoying what we have. Hmm..

"Kurosaki?"

A deep, booming voice screeched my train of thought to a halt, and I look over to see a concerned-looking Kizami sitting on my bedroom floor. I must have been staring off into space like a weirdo.

"Ahaha..sorry, sorry! I got lost in thought!" I sat next to him on the floor. He had my playstation controller in hand. Looks like he was trying to play a game. "Whatcha playing?"

"I don't know…you just handed me this controller when you got up to get changed." He said, handing it back to me. That figures, Kizami was never into video games. I sighed and took the controller back. "Are you feeling alright, Kurosaki?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"You don't seem fine."

Shit. Maybe now would be a good time to ask? About…us?

"Er…well, actually, I-" and then I looked at him. He was giving me a worried look, like a child that had just done something wrong. I felt my face heat up fast. Dammit, how can such a scary looking guy be so cute sometimes?! I snapped back to reality, and realized that I must have been staring at Kizami for who knows how long. I quickly turned away from him, to try and save face. "I-I guess I'm just tired..! Ehehehe.."

"Ah. I'm getting pretty tired as well. Maybe we should sleep." Kizami says, standing up. He extends his hand down to me to help me up, and I grabbed it almost reflexively.

"Yeah…"

I missed my chance. I'm sure there would be more in the future, but I couldn't help feeling a little discouraged as I climbed into my bed. Kizami climbed into the other side like always.

"Goodnight Kurosaki."

"Night Kizami."

* * *

I woke up the next morning without help from my alarm. That doesn't happen often, and it was actually kind of nice. I slowly opened my eyes, and the first thing I see is a large, blurry figure over me. Blinking a few times, it came into focus. It was Kizami. He was sitting up next to me, just staring down at me.

"Gaahh!" I let out a yelp and jumped back, pressing my back against the wall. I let out and impatient sigh when my brain finally processed that it was Kizami at my side. "K-kizami..you scared me, idiot!"

"Good morning, Kurosaki." He said, totally sidestepping how he terrified me. I just groaned and rubbed my eyes.

"How long have you been awake?"

"Mmm…about a half hour."

"And…you've just been sitting here watching me sleep?"

"Yes. You looked peaceful."

I felt my cheeks warming up again. "Sh-shut up." I blinked some more, and looked around the room. For some reason it wasn't as dark as it was some mornings. "Hey Kizami, what time is it anyway?"

"Almost 10."

"WHAT?!" I shot up out of bed and looked around for my phone, grabbing it and flipping it open without pulling the charger off. Sure enough, it was almost 10am. "Kizami we're so late for school!" I threw my covers off and went to climb out of bed, but suddenly my vision went dark. Kizami placed his hand over my eyes and pushed me back down on the bed. Not painfully, of course, but then again I didn't put up much of a struggle.

"Go back to sleep. You looked like you were having good dreams."

I sighed and gently pulled his hand off my eyes. I didn't try to fight it, I just laid on the bed, defeated. "Did you shut off my alarm?"

"Yes. Are you mad?"

I thought about it for a bit. I guess _one_ day couldn't hurt. "No, I'm not mad." I rolled over on my side, facing Kizami, who gave me a smile and reached up, starting to run his hand through my hair. There's no way I could get back to sleep now. But this was kind of nice…

"..Kizami…"

"Mm?"

"What's going on..between us?"

"Hm? What do you mean?"

I gently pulled his hand away from my head. "I-I mean..about the other day.."

"Oh. You mean when I kissed you?"

Kizami's expression never wavered, while my stomach was turning around and around. I wonder if he's just better at hiding it. "Y-yeah. I mean, what happens now?"

Kizami looked puzzled. "I'm not sure I understand."

"Well it's just, nothing has really changed since then! Are we dating now, or have you changed your mind about me? I-I'm just really confused!"

"Are you saying you want to be my boyfriend?"

Hearing that made my heart climb into my throat. It was what I wanted, yes, but…it was so different actually hearing it out loud, from Kizami. I swallowed hard, and managed to respond in a whisper. "W-well, yeah…"

Kizami smiled and just silently leaned in to kiss me. I instinctively closed my eyes, and leaned into him a little further. I nervously parted my lips slightly, and Kizami took the incentive. I felt his tongue slide past my lips and it sent a chill down my spine. I tangled my tongue with his, and I felt his breathing pace increase as he got excited. Feeling flustered, I pulled back. This was going just a bit fast for me. I looked up at Kizami, who was left panting softly and looking at me with half-lidded eyes. My face was practically radiating heat.

"I-I, um, th-that was, ah.." I stammered. I was panting as well and it was hard to collect my words and thoughts. Kizami just chuckled and leaned in again, planting a kiss on my forehead.

"You're so cute, Kurosaki."

I gently pushed his face away and laughed, probably out of nerves just because my heart was pounding. "Be quiet, idiot."

"Hey, is that any way to talk to your boyfriend?"

"Heh, my bad." I smiled again, giving him another light nudge. Even thought my heart was racing, I was very comfortable here. Kizami reaches over and bushed some of my hair out of my face, and I let out a relaxed sigh. I closed my eyes, actually comfortable enough to sleep for a little while longer. I felt Kizami take my hand in his, the one that wasn't stroking my hair anyway.

I was really happy here. One day off definitely couldn't hurt.

* * *

**(this one was kinda short i guess, but I really love this pairing, so I just want to write lots of fluff. Smut is next, I promise.)**


End file.
